I was, I am, I will be

I was no/where a while ago
I'm closer now but for how long
I'll be elsewhere until I go
I was undone, not knowing strong

I am not me, not quite, not yet
I will be new if time slows down
I was not real, the one not met
I am your friend until I drown

I was your double but didn't know
I'm almost ready to let it shine
I will be gone before you go
I was alone, now you're my lifeline

I am your strength, I'll let you grow
I will be here, lines intertwine.

tryptical illusion

i was so sure the year would be different
i was different
     i wanted to be
i was planning activities that would never see
     the light of day
i was failing and succeeding invariably
i was getting ahead of myself
     my usual self
i was smoking and maybe not healthier
     but i wasn't in the hospital then
     like i was a few weeks ago
i was coming and going to school like always
     the wind blew and the weather was nice
i was watching the world from the window
     in my room in the hospital
i was looking forward to the change
     to getting out

i am still changing
     still hoping for one
i am going over everything with a fine-toothed comb
i am in the middle of it
     of the mess of the end of another year
     here
i am where you are and we are air
     we breathe in it
i am what i tried most to avoid
i am a void an empty space
     black on black
     a vacuum
     an abyss

i will be happy in the end
i will be spending the summer with my family
     with friends
     with the memories
i will be remembering what it smelled like
     how cold it was
     how it felt
i will be feeling

I will be

I was only trying to move
I was only beginning
I was holding on to "soon"
I was afraid of committing
I was unfolding into a tomb
I was on the verge of quitting
I was handed the moon
I was told I wasn't living
I was colored all the way through
I was up for the bidding
I am a crooked sculpture carved into two
I am molding into form and shedding
I am going through the motions
I am just beginning

I

I was a kind hearted angel with no venom

I was a person of happiness until the light went out

I was here when the world was shaking then you pushed me back

I was a child of great brilliance

I was creative

I was smart

I was pretty but now

I am dumb

I am fearless yet I am fearful

I am evil but with you I am an equal

I am no one until I met someone

I am loyal until we were one

I am cautious yet I am the scapegoat

I am the one and only human still

I am nothing but filth and pain

I am changing and abiding

I am at peace with this place

I am insecure to this day

I am alive again when I get what I want

I am dying slowly each day I am here

I am a hard worker I'll get through this

I am failing I'll be through with this

I am here to stay

I am gonna leave

I am intelligent

I am structured

I am learning each day

I am achieving my goals 

I will be a dreamer

I will be a kind hearted angel

I will be happy

I will be the smartest person

I will have a beautiful heart

I will change my life

It started from a purple prosody case

It started from a purple prosody case

Puffed up with chocolates, brown and white

Nothing compares to this delicious chocolate bar

We ate it and washed it down with bright white stars

Sipping peachy liquid alive with bubbles

Rising to the surface to pop in a psychedelic sunset, all reddish and yellowish

Just like my maturity out off the bright yellow country side

The stark bright white lights had blinded my eyes

After that, only a paler shade of darkness

A blade glinting in the silvery starlight

Such when the brown ground become slippery

The dirt eats you up in decade of time

Grimy grey dust that you will become

Rust in a red sunset of your life

With no shame under the fiery red rays

What rose out of the grey-green muck of the colloquial

the politically incorrect warrior of these with green stacks
the yellow sun had risen after the fact
shining brightly onto a plate of sparkling greenery
a salad of the senses, spotted with black pepper
so delicious you can taste the brown dirt
rich with death and salty white grains
among them, an amber nugget from a forgotten god
a nod toward the heaven's and all that's blue
a place where we can drink the red wines and swim in a river filled with glistening honey
eyes so green they lure you in like money
that sinful colour of greed
who needs gold?
when I'm here in my bold suit with green stacks
I shall paint my lips red and never look back

The world gazes back through my blue tinted sunglasses.

They turn everything realistically pink,
purple, white, and yellow, little marshmallow peeps,
tiny rabbits that feed off the greens under the yellow sun.

She raised her head of red and the singing had begun.
The black notes flying up to the sky,
bluing toward a darker moment,
a moment where your green eyes move towards mine,
a delicate touch where red lines intertwine.

Bloodshot eyes after too much burgundy.
The sun a white blotch on white sky,
just as the botched girl turned red fast,
her childishness pierced through, the blue didn't last.

Instead a rose-tinted view of adulthood
tears into yellow petals.

It all starts with green eyes looking down on you

A multitude of pink skies
Blossomed into a basket of pale yellowness
left wilting in the green grass on a Sunday afternoon
With a drink in my hand and four pairs of yellow socks
And a marching band carried out in unison withing the black plot
A splash of silver, so becoming of old age
So becoming weathered, like platinum
Very rich and fabulous like titanium on the Titanic
The red dots on the front of the ship make me panic
Put out a red flag to make them stop
We might drag her into the olive sea
To which our blue love will see
What blue and dark shall belong to me
Deep in the emerald, hostile sea.

ACTIVITY: Write about Eraser

You cannot use the word "eraser" or "rubber" in your writing.

do it better but no

Unexpectedly stern
For all her softy touch
She sat there glaring
Staring
Watching me burn and yearn
For words such and such
Tearing
Words out like weeds
tears rolling down beads
Who needs
This unsparing
Scathing blot
Blasting naught

It's unfair, it's unjust,
I moaned.
But you must,
She intoned.
Do it better, do it right
Make more effort, use your might
Give me good, give me true!

Oh I'm tired, hungry, blue
Going home. And... screw you.

morning light

fades night's softening edges
turns a day slowly
toward some climactic moment
bored or otherwise
well-scored
a cake
you make sense
of what was dessert or dinner
were you really so much thinner
once upon a time
you were a line on paper
drawn to something bolder
what now seems colder
in this space

Undo your mistakes

Undo your mistakes

Removing all the waste

As I keep the aftertaste

Next I will disappear and then I will appear

No matter how hard it is my heart will mend

And dissolve into the obscene

My vanishing voice assembles as my astonishing poems dissemble

Into the universe of subtle eruption

But wait now I'm awake and oh it's a dream

It has all been a lie

It is I the Earth you might

Only you can undo your mistakes but I cannot turn back time

So please just abide 

And you'll change your life

mosaic of regret

these words are intelligible
to the ears
resonating in both hemispheres
retracing the ambient past
being sentient doesn't last
what I wish I could undo
but no chance to go back
a citrus drop into my open sternum
leaping into the vacuum of a weightless mass
soft sand beneath my feet
falling like crashing pillars into its hands
a thief so close to my heart
stealing sanity from an empty glass
a ticking time bomb
looking behind while the years pass
my childish intensity
didn't mean to turn you crass
you crawl back into your den
night follows and in stays the darker cast

It is normal to be no one.

I do not play

Nor do I slay


But if I had a chance I would glow

And steal the ring I had spawn


Today a sunny day in my opinion

Today a hollow day with no Dominion


Three hours pass by and my heart stops

Each minute is a storm that pops


Every day unfolds a new nightmare

To my despair


I grief no sad man nor woman

As they are all solemn


Though I am no slave

I am treated worse than a grave

Church tower in spring wind and 14 lines

It was a church tower standing

Weakly in the wind, swaying

Meekly, yet commanding

Singing rather than praying  

The tower was of gentle yellow hue

Facing the stinging freshness of the skies

Tracing its own unmitigated blue

Shadowy sharpness of spiral highs

We strolled a-past and saw the tower

Swinging its spire in happy dance

Singing of bricks that gave it power

Embracing us in Gothic trance

A painter painted the tower sway

And fainted, giving it away (to us)

Kaleidoscope

Only love, when all you feel
is beneath, where i kneel
only feel, when all you love
touches your Achilles' heel

you divide the open flesh wounds
spill your filth inside
salt could be more gentle
negligence cried

your one lone citizen
ignoring the warning signs
familiarizing the innocence
awaiting to meet the inevitable demise

a view through a kaleidoscope, visions of a hundred stars
a wreckage that cannot be undone, of recklessly painted scars

more of wasted

more of wasted
time          we tasted
too much          blushed
our feelings crushed

we hurried along
worried          a song
on our lips          we thought
we were and were not

better          we saved and sinned
wished into the wind
over oceans          buried
in earth          we married

gave birth          tried
hard          again          lied